Autumn is the time of year that I should like to meet you here...

Hey

So i haven't blogged in a while. At least not on this blog. I have on the K-cab one but then again that wasn't really like broad and I can't ramble as much there =P

For the past couple of days I guess I don't know...life's been alright. Well the last time I wrote was Sunday night so I guess I'll start with Monday. Not that I remember too much from Monday...oh except for the fact that I took the bus the first time this year home =P it's actually pretty fun and kind of relaxing when there aren't a lot of people and it's just you looking out a pretty big window and it's...pretty great =) and then I saw Kevin, Neil and Mike get on the bus. Which was pretty cool. =) Especially because 2 of them are in my cell group. woot woot =P
which reminds me about encouragement notes. Which i have not been able to really do yet. I've only made a couple. Will make more. Tonight. Definitely =)
Especially because tonight i have a curfew. 11. dang. but it's good because then i get more sleep =)

So moving onto yesterday. Which was basically the K-cab group. Well that seemed to be the highlight of the day. It was a pretty good lesson. How to know when you have to bail out from a relationship. I guess I hope i won't have to apply this anytime soon but maybe i've already done it without really knowing. Like....some people that I don't really talk to anymore but then again maybe it wasn't really for the purpose of evangelism...but more because we kind of just drifted because we weren't really that close to begin with. But overall it was a pretty cool lesson and we talked about devos afterwards and like the past weeks, we just talked in general about our friends and how we're doing in terms of "influencing" them and applying scarcity, authority, likeability and.....the last one which i will remember sometime =P dang. Can't believe I already forgot it. Well...basically I thought it was a really good lesson but yesterday I guess i experienced some issues with just...self-image. As Andy Stanley would say, image management.

Oh yea, and i've been listening to Andy Stanley's series on Q3. which is actually pretty cool and pretty insightful. I'll digress from the above topic to write bout it a little =P So the first sermon was based on praying for something big because the way he put it was that most of our prayer life is revolved around the minusa (small things) of our everyday lives that are going to fix themselves anyway in the long run. And it talked about having something to pray for that's SOOO bold that it honors God. That it honors his greatness and it's also about having the faith in Him and his ability as GOD to answer your prayer. Which makes sense. So my 'big' thing is that our congregation move. That we all get up and do something if we've fallen into a sense of complacency or lukewarmness. And for K-cab and for all of KNA that by the end of this year, we'll all be comfortable to reach out to our friends. That we won't be afraid to reach out and tell our friends about our faith because we see the need for it and because we have found a constant home within our fellowship. HOME =) theme. second sermon was on accountability and being able to tell someone everything about your life and being that person to somebody else. To be so attached to them and so accountable to them that when they're alone, you want to go there with them because you just want to talk with them and stuff like that so much =) sounds awesome.

ALRIGHTYS! back to last night. It was weird because I felt myself being self-conscious. I also felt myself worrying about things that I needn't worry about. Too much of the "what am i going to say" stuff going through my head. Like thinking of what you'd say to a person before you talk to them. Because that stuffs dumb =\ These are my k-cab buddies. I should be like the most open with them above all people. I shouldn't have to worry about what they think. Sadly i did. And as I kind of watched them talk to her, i couldn't help wonder why I couldn't just freely talk. I was so scared i'd be awkward that in being scared, i end up being awkward. But I talked to a friend about it afterwards. But still. I keep finding myself making excuses. Maybe thinking that i'm a bother when...i'm not. because i know that these people love me so I need to get these thoughts out my head. I can't let Satan do this. Because when i lose openness with my brothers and sisters....then i begin to lose my relationship with people in general.
so pray for me?

=)
-Chris