so continuously posting in 2 blogs just doesn't seem to be right.
so i'll stick with the wordpress until further notices
http://theunforcedrhythmsofgrace.wordpress.com/
sorry it's not a link =P
just copy and post
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Thursday, January 14, 2010
where do we go from here?
Hey
So this is my first official post from wordpress. And just as a sidenote, I do agree with py, the double spacing is kind of mad annoying because it takes up a lot of room and what not but it’s alright.
Today my mom talked to me at dinner about my plans for the summer and although it was casual I could catch the hints of “don’t spend too much time at church”. And I get where she’s coming from. My sister told me to widen my horizons and I get that. And it’s still possible to serve God anywhere not matter where I am for the summer. Haha I can serve God without knowing the 2nd law of thermodynamics =)
I think I really felt called to go on a missions trip this year. Somewhere where it’ll break everything I know. Somewhere different and away from home and away from comfort and away from all the temptations of being lazy. Just me, God, His word, and His work to be done. And I guess Manitoba was what I had in mind. For a while now. I don’t know how much it’ll be or what time it is. But I want to go. But it needs prayer. Alot of it. Because right now. It’s I want to go. And that might be completely different from where God wants me to go. But it’s something that’s been on my mind for a while and I know it’ll take a relative chunk out of my summer because of the training and the trip itself.
There’s the notion of a job. And I’m not sure if that’s where I belong. Like I love doing stuff and all and I don’t mind working but I don’t want to be consumed by work to the point where I can’t effectively spend time with cell group and family and friends. Because I’ve seen that happen and sometimes when I try to plan stuff, some people can never make it because of work.
I guess when it comes down the core of it all, it’s definitely something I need to lift to God. There’s some many things that I could do. But maybe it’s not what I’m meant to do. So for now it’s up in the air and in prayer. Until after exams, that’s when I’ll sit down and begin planning. and by planning i mean sitting and praying and reading Acts. =)
Yesterday we all spent some time together and I love seeing them on Wednesdays but I feel like it hasn’t been really….God filled. you know what I mean? It’s always consumed by side conversations and I watch the time and I hope we can get everything done by like 8:45 but it never appears that it gets that and maybe for once we should just go into the prayer room. And leave the distractions and computers and just sit and pray because that’s essentially the whole purpose of meeting up anyways.
Fellowship tomorrow. Drifting Wood. Accountability with C. Excited =)
p.requests:
- not worrying about the exams that are coming and to just focus on God, family and keeping up with friends
- not to become busy to the point of losing focus. my focus is God. that’s it. and that’s all it’ll ever need to be.
thanks
-Chris
So this is my first official post from wordpress. And just as a sidenote, I do agree with py, the double spacing is kind of mad annoying because it takes up a lot of room and what not but it’s alright.
Today my mom talked to me at dinner about my plans for the summer and although it was casual I could catch the hints of “don’t spend too much time at church”. And I get where she’s coming from. My sister told me to widen my horizons and I get that. And it’s still possible to serve God anywhere not matter where I am for the summer. Haha I can serve God without knowing the 2nd law of thermodynamics =)
I think I really felt called to go on a missions trip this year. Somewhere where it’ll break everything I know. Somewhere different and away from home and away from comfort and away from all the temptations of being lazy. Just me, God, His word, and His work to be done. And I guess Manitoba was what I had in mind. For a while now. I don’t know how much it’ll be or what time it is. But I want to go. But it needs prayer. Alot of it. Because right now. It’s I want to go. And that might be completely different from where God wants me to go. But it’s something that’s been on my mind for a while and I know it’ll take a relative chunk out of my summer because of the training and the trip itself.
There’s the notion of a job. And I’m not sure if that’s where I belong. Like I love doing stuff and all and I don’t mind working but I don’t want to be consumed by work to the point where I can’t effectively spend time with cell group and family and friends. Because I’ve seen that happen and sometimes when I try to plan stuff, some people can never make it because of work.
I guess when it comes down the core of it all, it’s definitely something I need to lift to God. There’s some many things that I could do. But maybe it’s not what I’m meant to do. So for now it’s up in the air and in prayer. Until after exams, that’s when I’ll sit down and begin planning. and by planning i mean sitting and praying and reading Acts. =)
Yesterday we all spent some time together and I love seeing them on Wednesdays but I feel like it hasn’t been really….God filled. you know what I mean? It’s always consumed by side conversations and I watch the time and I hope we can get everything done by like 8:45 but it never appears that it gets that and maybe for once we should just go into the prayer room. And leave the distractions and computers and just sit and pray because that’s essentially the whole purpose of meeting up anyways.
Fellowship tomorrow. Drifting Wood. Accountability with C. Excited =)
p.requests:
- not worrying about the exams that are coming and to just focus on God, family and keeping up with friends
- not to become busy to the point of losing focus. my focus is God. that’s it. and that’s all it’ll ever need to be.
thanks
-Chris
maybe now
So I'm going to try something out
we'll see how it goes right?
http://theunforcedrhythmsofgrace.wordpress.com/
welcome to the ridiculously intense looking world of wordpress.
oh dang snap.
may God use it for His purposes
we'll see how it goes right?
http://theunforcedrhythmsofgrace.wordpress.com/
welcome to the ridiculously intense looking world of wordpress.
oh dang snap.
may God use it for His purposes
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
your grace extends to call me friend
Hey
So i'll keep it short because i need to get back to calculus but it's felt like a pretty monotone 2 days. I guess it's not necessarily a sign that it's been a bad 2 days but more like it's kind of more quiet and calm compared to last week. I think a lot of my focus is now geared toward school and not just the academics but the people who I've seemed to lose contact with last week because I was never home and I didn't have a lot of time to talk with them.
I guess there's a lot of things that God's subtly teaching me through school and I'm glad that it's a little slower and that I can have some quiet time during my school day to spend with God, even if that time's a couple minutes during lunch praying. I'm also really trying to evaluate myself on my complaining and godless chatter.
It's so easy for me to become tempted to talk about nonsense and even gossip when I'm not surrounded by believers and it's something I've been trying to think about this week. Also, with the complaining I can feel myself do it sometimes, to my friends about some course that I'm actually not doing bad in or about tests that I actually don't mind and it's sometimes because maybe there's nothing else to talk about or to extend a conversation.
And these past couple of days I feel like I've forgotten the immensity of the first commandment that Jesus gave to us.
I feel like I've forgotten what all means. I feel like I've been loving God with my heart, keeping Him in mind. But not all my heart. I yearn for Him and want to spend that time in devotions with Him, but it's hard to tell sometimes whether he's at the top of my list or not. And I know that it's going to be impossible as long as I'm human and as long as I sin but I'm praying for discipline and that heart.
My post feels scattered all over the place. Overviews without specifying kind of like drawing pictures without shading them in and leaving them full of blanks. And maybe that's okay because maybe I don't even know what's going on fully. I know that God'll reveal to me what his will is as it goes on. I just pray i'm listening and looking. Looking forward to tomorrow. It's been a week. Sometimes I feel like that's too long.
p.requests:
- heart to yearn after God above everything else
thanks
-Chris
So i'll keep it short because i need to get back to calculus but it's felt like a pretty monotone 2 days. I guess it's not necessarily a sign that it's been a bad 2 days but more like it's kind of more quiet and calm compared to last week. I think a lot of my focus is now geared toward school and not just the academics but the people who I've seemed to lose contact with last week because I was never home and I didn't have a lot of time to talk with them.
I guess there's a lot of things that God's subtly teaching me through school and I'm glad that it's a little slower and that I can have some quiet time during my school day to spend with God, even if that time's a couple minutes during lunch praying. I'm also really trying to evaluate myself on my complaining and godless chatter.
Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life
- Philippians 2:14-16
Avoid godless chatter, because those who indulge in it will become more and more ungodly.
- 2 Timothy 2:16
And these past couple of days I feel like I've forgotten the immensity of the first commandment that Jesus gave to us.
He answered: " 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'
- Luke 10:27
I feel like I've forgotten what all means. I feel like I've been loving God with my heart, keeping Him in mind. But not all my heart. I yearn for Him and want to spend that time in devotions with Him, but it's hard to tell sometimes whether he's at the top of my list or not. And I know that it's going to be impossible as long as I'm human and as long as I sin but I'm praying for discipline and that heart.
My post feels scattered all over the place. Overviews without specifying kind of like drawing pictures without shading them in and leaving them full of blanks. And maybe that's okay because maybe I don't even know what's going on fully. I know that God'll reveal to me what his will is as it goes on. I just pray i'm listening and looking. Looking forward to tomorrow. It's been a week. Sometimes I feel like that's too long.
p.requests:
- heart to yearn after God above everything else
thanks
-Chris
Saturday, January 9, 2010
shine a light, lead me home
Hey
So I guess it's kind of over. The week of hectic madness, of amazing prayer meeting, of late nights and lifting insurmountable things to God. Not quite sure if I even used that word in it's proper context.
I realized beginning Friday that I'd been so worried about getting things wrong and losing timing and forgetting things that I forgot the purpose of the whole night. The whole night wasn't based around performances. In the end it didn't even seem like that. It was based around love. God's sacrificial love. And I knew that I needed to be filled with it first before doing anything because it'd be completely useless if I did it perfectly but had no love.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. - 1 Corinthians 13:2
Up to the very last minute before the night began I was doing something, running around and I could feel myself being pulled all over the place. The last prayer meeting I guess was something that I'd heard a lot. It's said at every giant massive event but it's true nonetheless.
The whole night, the first hour it was a rush. I guess it was a lot of "get on stage now! wait get the mics! are you ready? i'm not ready. let's do this" and I really forgot to pray in the critical moments like that but praise God that He hears the Spirit praying for me. Spoken Word, it went alright I think. We all hit our cues just about and I hope it started the night off with some thought. Skit I used Jake and Ryan simultaneously because well..i got nervous. We ended up finishing a lot earlier than anticipated but that's alright. Dance, it went a lot smoother than i thought it would. Did some of the steps a little off and kicked the ball off but recovered. And overall after all that, I was glad it was over. I just wanted to sit down. To stop it all. Or at least stop myself. I wanted to stop and spend some time with God and I was just glad that the first half of the night was over.
The counselors had their individual testimonies and it was interesting and convicting. Some more than others. Learning to put God first. I've been so focused on WTF, with school all over the place this week and as much as I know i need to do devos and as much as I'm singing worship songs under my breath during school, it's still not the same. It's still not the same focus. And that's something I really need to focus on now. I've wanted to spend a day with God for a long time now. Just a day of sitting there with God and the Bible and praying and reading and praying and reading and memorizing Scripture and letting it pierce through me.
I don't know why. My heart feels heavy right now. I told myself to finish the family worship skit but I feel like just sitting down in my room alone and just to break myself down and to go to the core of everything. I need to be broken. And i can feel myself leaving a state of brokenness. When our sight is fixed on the approval of man and not of God it becomes different. Yesterday we went to Destiny and parts of it were alright and other parts I felt oddly out of place. I never feel at ease at places like that. Kind of like expensive drinks and just an atmosphere with some secular music and late nights. It feels artificial, kind of fake. People go out to have a good time but inside, they could be hurting, they could be tired, they could be putting on a mask. I guess that's why I don't love really like fancy stuff like that. Raw park nights, nights sitting on a hardwood floor talking and laughing together, praying in a car. There's so much in this world that we shouldn't be doing. And i guess this is a time for me to evaluate myself. To find my priorities and rearrange them. And put God first. I don't want to live my life any other way.
I'm glad I got to talk to some people yesterday and just learn about how they were doing even if it was for just a couple of short minutes. I miss seeing my cell group too. I saw parts of them yesterday and I was in such a rush I didn't get to talk to them and I miss seeing us all together and it's just such an amazing opportunity and experience that God has given to me. and it's so humbling being in a cell group and when they blow your mind.
Sorry i'm terribly scrambled this entire post because my mind's floating all over the place.
Some big things on my mind. I want to go on missions this year. Manitoba. And i really want to go. But that's just ME. I don't know if God wants me to go and so it's something to pray about. TC, i'm worried about it taking up so much time. every saturday. 3 hours. 4 including driving time. I'm not going to semi, i don't belong in that kind of environment. I guess it kind of mimics Destiny's. that kind of feel. the emptiness. the fakeness. the people full of passions that mean nothing. people filled with false understandings of love.
Yesterday a friend asked me about the girl. I haven't mentioned that in a while. I was going to in the new year post but it got a tad long. So it seems that it's kind of faded out. I still see her and I want to get to know her more and I want to talk with her and whatnot but I don't think that's the characteristics of liking someone. I think that's the characteristics of wanting to befriend somebody. And maybe that's what it was all along but nobody knew how to classify it every time i talked about it.
So here comes the end of my post of scattered thoughts and of blunt rhythms.
p.requests:
- priorities. God. prayer. family. friends. school.
- trust in the Lord and to give my life to Him. Oh how easily we say that. Do we really know what it means?
-Chris
So I guess it's kind of over. The week of hectic madness, of amazing prayer meeting, of late nights and lifting insurmountable things to God. Not quite sure if I even used that word in it's proper context.
I realized beginning Friday that I'd been so worried about getting things wrong and losing timing and forgetting things that I forgot the purpose of the whole night. The whole night wasn't based around performances. In the end it didn't even seem like that. It was based around love. God's sacrificial love. And I knew that I needed to be filled with it first before doing anything because it'd be completely useless if I did it perfectly but had no love.
If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. - 1 Corinthians 13:2
Up to the very last minute before the night began I was doing something, running around and I could feel myself being pulled all over the place. The last prayer meeting I guess was something that I'd heard a lot. It's said at every giant massive event but it's true nonetheless.
The whole night, the first hour it was a rush. I guess it was a lot of "get on stage now! wait get the mics! are you ready? i'm not ready. let's do this" and I really forgot to pray in the critical moments like that but praise God that He hears the Spirit praying for me. Spoken Word, it went alright I think. We all hit our cues just about and I hope it started the night off with some thought. Skit I used Jake and Ryan simultaneously because well..i got nervous. We ended up finishing a lot earlier than anticipated but that's alright. Dance, it went a lot smoother than i thought it would. Did some of the steps a little off and kicked the ball off but recovered. And overall after all that, I was glad it was over. I just wanted to sit down. To stop it all. Or at least stop myself. I wanted to stop and spend some time with God and I was just glad that the first half of the night was over.
The counselors had their individual testimonies and it was interesting and convicting. Some more than others. Learning to put God first. I've been so focused on WTF, with school all over the place this week and as much as I know i need to do devos and as much as I'm singing worship songs under my breath during school, it's still not the same. It's still not the same focus. And that's something I really need to focus on now. I've wanted to spend a day with God for a long time now. Just a day of sitting there with God and the Bible and praying and reading and praying and reading and memorizing Scripture and letting it pierce through me.
I don't know why. My heart feels heavy right now. I told myself to finish the family worship skit but I feel like just sitting down in my room alone and just to break myself down and to go to the core of everything. I need to be broken. And i can feel myself leaving a state of brokenness. When our sight is fixed on the approval of man and not of God it becomes different. Yesterday we went to Destiny and parts of it were alright and other parts I felt oddly out of place. I never feel at ease at places like that. Kind of like expensive drinks and just an atmosphere with some secular music and late nights. It feels artificial, kind of fake. People go out to have a good time but inside, they could be hurting, they could be tired, they could be putting on a mask. I guess that's why I don't love really like fancy stuff like that. Raw park nights, nights sitting on a hardwood floor talking and laughing together, praying in a car. There's so much in this world that we shouldn't be doing. And i guess this is a time for me to evaluate myself. To find my priorities and rearrange them. And put God first. I don't want to live my life any other way.
I'm glad I got to talk to some people yesterday and just learn about how they were doing even if it was for just a couple of short minutes. I miss seeing my cell group too. I saw parts of them yesterday and I was in such a rush I didn't get to talk to them and I miss seeing us all together and it's just such an amazing opportunity and experience that God has given to me. and it's so humbling being in a cell group and when they blow your mind.
Sorry i'm terribly scrambled this entire post because my mind's floating all over the place.
Some big things on my mind. I want to go on missions this year. Manitoba. And i really want to go. But that's just ME. I don't know if God wants me to go and so it's something to pray about. TC, i'm worried about it taking up so much time. every saturday. 3 hours. 4 including driving time. I'm not going to semi, i don't belong in that kind of environment. I guess it kind of mimics Destiny's. that kind of feel. the emptiness. the fakeness. the people full of passions that mean nothing. people filled with false understandings of love.
Yesterday a friend asked me about the girl. I haven't mentioned that in a while. I was going to in the new year post but it got a tad long. So it seems that it's kind of faded out. I still see her and I want to get to know her more and I want to talk with her and whatnot but I don't think that's the characteristics of liking someone. I think that's the characteristics of wanting to befriend somebody. And maybe that's what it was all along but nobody knew how to classify it every time i talked about it.
So here comes the end of my post of scattered thoughts and of blunt rhythms.
p.requests:
- priorities. God. prayer. family. friends. school.
- trust in the Lord and to give my life to Him. Oh how easily we say that. Do we really know what it means?
-Chris
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
His love endures forever
Hey
You know there's a whole like chapter in Psalms with "his love endures forever" every other line?
You know there's a whole like chapter in Psalms with "his love endures forever" every other line?
I think that's pretty amazing =)
I haven't blogged in a while and I guess it's mainly because I haven't been home to blog. It's been WTF practices...everyday. I realized that I've seen like Steph and PY almost everyday since Wednesday. And for at least 3 hours. And I guess I've been feeling pressure not from school but with being with my family. I don't want to spend so much time at church. I love spending time with my church family and having amazing experiences and times but I also want to be home, helping out, spending time with my sister, hanging clothes. Essentially being part of the family and participating.
Tonight we had prayer meeting. And it was beautiful. At first I was like...."uh just the 6 of us?" but in the end it didn't matter how many people we had. We talked a lot about random stuff in the first hour and a half and then we got into a time of prayer and God, thank you for my amazing brothers and sisters. Praying was just beautiful. There was this kind of urgency in our voices and it was uplifting having others pray around me for me like that. And there's honestly so much to praise God for. And it seems like WTF's gone really well the last couple of days all things considering but it's only really because God provides. There's been so many complications and yet we've able to overcome all of them.
And I realized it's a wednesday and it was just 4 of us in the end and I was glad that there was time for silence and just a little bit of instrumental and it helped me not rush back into anything and just to think about what I prayed for and the things to come. Reminded me of rooftop. one day a long time ago =) That God's love really does last forever. Thank you.
p.requests:
- diligence and that when I do WTF stuff that I do it with the intention of praising God.
-Chris
Sunday, January 3, 2010
time God time God time God GOD
so much
so little time
with Family
with everything
God I don't want to be so consumed by DOING everything that I don't FEEL the true impact of it all
I want this WTF to teach me and remind me just as much as everyone else
I don't want to be too busy
I'm sorry for not saying no
for letting this week become so hectic.
and above all else
above school
above any WTF practice
I pray that I can spend time with you
real time
somebody once told me that you can't be spiritually drained from doing too many things
you get physically drained doing that
spiritually drained is when you don't spend time with God.
pray for me?
so little time
with Family
with everything
God I don't want to be so consumed by DOING everything that I don't FEEL the true impact of it all
I want this WTF to teach me and remind me just as much as everyone else
I don't want to be too busy
I'm sorry for not saying no
for letting this week become so hectic.
and above all else
above school
above any WTF practice
I pray that I can spend time with you
real time
somebody once told me that you can't be spiritually drained from doing too many things
you get physically drained doing that
spiritually drained is when you don't spend time with God.
pray for me?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)