you're free. did you know that?

Hey

So yesterday I was reading in Galatians...well then i flipped to a whole bunch of places in the bible because i didn't really feel sleepy and it was interesting just flipping around and in Galatians, in whatever chapter i'm on, it was talking about how we're free. Free from being restrained by law. And I remember reading from something else...probably a devo book and it was challenging the reader to think about their own life and if they live free. Free from the things that bind us to this world. Free from the law of sin. And I didn't know if i could answer yes. Because really like...am i living as if i'm free? Wouldn't i look so much more joyful if i was free? And I know that I'm free. and like Paul says, I shouldn't be reliving my "childhood of sin" . Something for me to think about. To not be bound by things that I know aren't worth my time to be bound to. Not sure if that last sentence made much sense. =P

Last night also happened to be Drifting Wood CGN v 2.0 I think. I think it's the second. Well technically the second one that we planned. And i know that before the night I was like...really stressed out. Because I didn't know who was coming, who was eating, where we were even going to be! Because i'm not good with booking and therefore we ended up having to ninja into a room because of the major takeover from the scouts. They took up like EVERYWHERE. like not even kidding =P with their sleepover, and their pretend campfire, and their hot chocolate making, and their wood tying and intense like craft making and like EVERYTHING. we ended up getting a room on the side of the new basement =P Also, two grade 9 girls from my cell group emailed me thursday night telling me they'd get pizza and when i got that i was like PTL because it's just...so amazing to see them caring for the cell group =) And it's just awesome and they brought friends. Interesting friends. 2J. Maybe we'll see them again =P It'll probably be different next time when they come back =P Not as super chills. 

In the end, I think it went...really well =P The food was like rushed and everything but we all got to spend like 30 minutes with our accountability partners and I really hoped they got to talk to each other about like...all the things they were going through with each other. C wasn't there yesterday so i ended up spending time with Chung and it was really great because we talked about cell group leading and he reminded me of a lot of things that...well i'd forgotten in the whole rushing and mess of things. Firstly, God has blessed me with an AMAZING cell group with AMAZING people =) Like actually =) Like they're so honest. Like if they don't want to answer a question, they won't answer it and if they're interested, they'll show it. And i guess I really love that about them. So does Chung =P And i'm sure the others do too. And secondly, I can't compare cell groups. I could feel myself doing that the past couple days with the planning and everything. It seemed like we were the only cell group who wasn't at a cell group leader or counselor's house but that didn't matter and turned out Team Fly was at church too =P They were hot potting. Which was pretty cool =) 

After a-partner time we just went into...Taboo =) In the end i probably didn't have to bring all the stuff I did. I brought a guitar, wii, wii games and stuff and Taboo. I only needed Taboo =P It took like actually an hour and if we wanted to, we could spend 6 hours doing it and it'd still be fun =) It was really great seeing people get involved and really into it. I think it got kind of competitive =P Especially with Chung. So into it. Boys vs. Girls. And it was just fun because people who didn't usually talk got to play and got to try and get people to guess stuff. I think only one person didn't really get into it. But he had to leave early too. But i'm glad Calvin's got T for his accountability partner. I know he'll be awesome with him =)

I learned a lot last night. I learned to trust God again. And so i'm excited for the next cell group night =) It's gonna be wicked awesome because I just know that it will be. And God will move amazingly in amazing unknown ways =) And i relearned that my cell group is the bomb =) And it was just a really great time, spending time with them =) And just kind of reminded me of cruise times when me and my cousins played taboo until like...1 or 2 and we still wouldn't want to stop =P 

So now I should go. A small run down of today. My mom came home =) And she just spent some time to eat dinner. Maybe she's staying overnight. Probably gonna go back to my grandma's tomorrow but it's still nice seeing her =) Haven't seen her in like a week. more actually. and today's worship practice was a little lonely in the booth but had some good time praying with each other in the super cold sanctuary =P  
well time for the dissection write up =) 

p.requests:
- really put my trust in the Lord. That He will work amazing things 
- discipline to do my work, help out in house and NOT play games 
- spend more prayer and time in cell group leading =) because it's awesome 

thanks =)

-Chris 

grab hold before it's gone

Hey

So I haven't blogged since Sunday and it's been...a really crazy past 3 days. Like i've been so on edge it seems with other people and so unable to plan things and to get everything...organized. I can see it in the way I interact with other people and I guess I kind of feel bad for that. Like I haven't been...the best kind of person these past few days. 

I've been having tests...major tests for the past 2 days and i guess it's been kind of hard because i'm so stressed out about studying and i know i should be...but i end up being stressed. And for bio it wasn't that bad because i came out of the test feeling alright. Today it was calc and it was...difficult. And afterwards I felt so disappointed in myself. Because it's not even about the mark that I get back from. It's the fact that I didn't study as much as I should've. And I kind of stayed up with my dad last night and we reviewed some stuff and it seemed okay but come test time....I had no faith in myself and my math ability afterwards.
Afterwards I was talking to a friend who was staying after school as well and he told me how he had failed one question and it was like 5/11 marks and he was...pretty chills about it.

And then I guess i realized that it was because I felt like I had kind of failed my parents. I've always had an alright time getting high marks and i'm blessed with a brain that can take in information relatively well. Like when I study i probably have to study for less time than the average person in my class and still get higher than them. But I guess i can't do that anymore. And I know that. I have to get disciplined and DO my math. and keep up with it. and not just assume i know it. 
My mom called me while I was still at school and while I was telling her about the math test I felt myself tearing and it was the first time in a long time that I had been tearing for reasons that weren't related with yawning. And it was from that overwhelming feeling of failure and like i'd let them down. Because they invest a lot of time in me. They don't make me do a lot of chores. They let me go to church. And they trust that I'll do well in school and that i'll try. And getting a probably 60% on a math test just...isn't what they're invested for. I don't know really how to put it. But bottom line I guess is just that I felt like I let them down. And in a sense it goes with God too. like He's blessed me with this crazy ability to memorize and all that but I'm not using it to the fullest of it's ability. I should put it to work. And serving in church is not an excuse to not working hard. Because i need to balance. 

I realized that my mom's been gone for...a good week now. More. And it's weird because life's kind of gone on the same. I talk to her on the phone. I think I like doing more stuff. Even packing my own lunch has a feeling that...i'm doing something. And today I learned to peel an orange efficiently and I can just feel in general that I'm not as super lazy and that I'm doing stuff and I hope I continue it even after my mom comes back. I like spending time with my dad. Even if it's just talking about math and random stuff. 

And today we had wednesday chill groups and it was nice to just hang out with them. Didn't really get to talk to them as much about like issues we're all going through but it was nice anyways. Just knowing that I can always talk to them and go to them. 

I guess the night is drifting on. Drifting Wood. CGN. haha i'm kind of excited =) 
excited for a-group time =)

p.requests: 
- loving people i don't know
- discipline to do my work and to do stuff around the house =) 

thanks 

-Chris

we didn't come to worship under any other Name

Hey 

Woke up this morning and I ended up making breakfast and everything for myself. Usually my mom's downstairs but I came down and it was still dark and it was kind of fun just doing everything. And letting my dad sleep in =P 

Got to church and worship was good. Short. Fast. Got to chill on the stage for a little and it was nice not being super rushed and stressing about time. Driven didn't have any AV person so i did some rush AV until Ben came then it was fine. We prayed in groups before service. And it's something we haven't done in a while. We've been so rushed these last couple of months that we didn't get to really pray for a bit before worship started. The sermon was good. It's a message I think I need to hear. Like i know it. And it's probably something that's been said at least 20 times to me because I've been here for like...7 years. It was about reaching out to other people and not to let culture , area and laziness get in the way. 

Children worship was...it was fun today =) The kids did the actions and it was just kind of less stressful because when we stared at each other between actions we were all kind of laughing because we weren't completely sure about them. And she looked happier. Which is good. She looked so tired in the morning, hope she got enough rest. 

Got to practice some stuff with the youth worship team for the Christmas Eve Chinese Service. Was pretty fun =P Gonna try and do some black gospel with Jeff. And Kevin when he comes to a practice =P It was good, just joking around and singing and just...having a blast =P 

Did my testimony today for the video and I was kind of nervous about it because it was kind of rushed and when I got there we were an hour behind because some people had taken more than 30 minutes which is reasonable and understandable. I kind of had some freak out ness for a while. Like Si ended up not changing anything but what took the longest was me doing it and just kind of sitting there going over the points. In the end I ended up looking super nervous, kind of serious and at the end i go ridiculous. But that's alright i guess =P 
I'm actually kind of hoping my school friends come. I don't know if they would because they're....well they're not really strongly religiously affiliated and I don't know if they'd see it as a big thing. Plus they might have work. But we'll see. I kind of invited them. Need to find out what time it is though before I tell them again. 

well i guess it's time to go.

p.requests:
- discipline; not getting lazy
- for school...i guess not to be so rushed as to not spend time praying. even when i'm walking. 

-Chris

You took the fall. and thought of me. above all

Hey 

So yesterday was accountability night. I'll keep this super short because well...I need to get to sleep but yesterday was...well it was pretty awesome =) in it's own little way =) Like every week. R wasn't here this week in Drifting Wood. Oh to backtrack, I went early and I kind of couldn't find PY so i didn't end up going to Joy practice =\ Which kind of sucks because it actually did happen and I kind of feel bad for missing it. I basically did math with Marco and kind of just...chilled with worship team....until calvin came. And nat . Then we planned the night =) I love when we do that. Sit in a room, talk about each other's lives, go through the plan lightly. Know what each other's doin. So Freddy got a beta version of the new pro presenter =P LAGGY. But in the end it kind of worked out. I guess they're excited to see it come out =P. Me? I don't mind the old one =P But for our cell group it was good. R wasn't there. So it was a little more quiet. But other people answered =P And my accountability partner was C. and it was nice talking to him. I know he's not fully open with me but it's alright because it's still deep. His use of words is....quite good =P Like he knows how to speak in an eloquent manner =P I'm really looking forward to being his accountability partner because he's really awesome and just... yea =) 

Today....well it was quite a day. This morning I did worship practice and...I got to fellowship with a great friend =) A great friend. And it was strange because I could see how her experiences were kind of things I'd gone through. And for a lot of it while she spoke I couldn't come up with anything to say but...maybe that's okay. Maybe all I was there for was an ear. And hopefully I did it well. So that was a super way to start off the morning. Reminded me of the old rooftop days. When it was a while ago =)  

Then I went to Markville's Roots because my mom wanted me buy sweaters and stuff  because my aunt had a 50% coupon on like everything. I ended up buying 2 sweaters and one pair of sweat pants for $100. And i felt like I broke the vow i made. To not buy anything. And there's a part of me that says it's okay because i'll use it and whatnot but....still. Did I really need those? And it doesn't equate if i give like $100 in return to World Vision or something like that because I'd do it anyway. I guess I'm struggling with whether I needed it or not. And what's necessary. And what I should be spending my money for. I guess it's something for me to really think about. I officially gave Drifting Wood our Christmas challenge last night. I'm really excited to see what happens. And I think...we'll be able to match it =) But I pray it's so much that we can't match it =P Because it's so much. That'd be absolutely amazing. 

Tonight I wasted a good 1.5 hours doing stupid things. Flash games to be exact. And I got so sick of myself and my lack of self control that after dinner I committed to not turn on the computer until i finished my portrait and studied for bio. And I thank God because I was able to do it. And it felt good. Not being consumed by worldly things that mean nothing. And art's always fun. A little pencil shading here, a little smudging here. Good release =) I'm kind of sad I didn't get to talk to many people tonight. But I'm glad I got things done. And I have to summarize that testimony =P Well that's about it for now. It's getting late. 

P. requests:
- discipline 
- really pray about what I do and where i put my money and also not to put that much emphasis on money. Because it's not the only way i can give. it's nearly the smallest way i can give 
- real devotions with a real devoted heart 

peace =) 
-Chris 

eyes on the Unseen

Hey 

Firstly, it's some epic weather outside. Looks kind of like those mystery novels. Misty, warm, kind of rainy and it's like gorgeous. But I was thinking to myself like...it should be snowing. Not misting. We've kind of blown up our world kind of insanely. It's so damaged that it can't snow in november anymore because the weather's so tripped up =\. Like it makes it seem nice...but I guess not for those who like the snow. 

Today I was kind of focused I think on marks which is something I shouldn't be. Like I got my calc test back today and I was like OH SNAP because the mark was kind of...bad =\ Like i'm probably getting the worst marks of my entire high school years in calc. But when I was back home I was thinking about where that comes from. Where that sense of failure came from. There were two sources. One was the fact that I felt like I had kind of let down my dad because I can totally do the stuff and because he spent time with me the night before the test to help me study. But the second was based on marks and how my marks were going to drop and all that jazz. And then I told myself that rationale was alright because it was grade 12 and it was for university. But who even knows if I'm going to university. I found myself being consumed by something that was rather trivial. And I was asking God to take that from me. to take away my obsession with marks and just to give me a heart to want to do well and use the gifts He's given me. 

I also went to Koolskool today. It was nice =) Pretty chills. I think i'm a little lazy =P It's different. From what I used to remember it as. They did worship for like the first time today. I wish I was there for like a sound check or just to hear them practice. It's nice being back. It's a pretty chills ministry and it kind of reminds me of peer helping =P The kids are....kind of the same. Well maybe the Koolskool ones are more lively =) And then I got to kind of chill with some of them afterwards. I realized Koolskool's REALLY short. Like it's just an hour and a half and it feels like it disappears really fast. But it's amazing to see the change in some of the kids. And hopefully some of them absorbed the message and the worship. I hope i can go back soon. 

That probably concludes it up. I need to make my cell group bucket. For the moneys. For the challenge. I'm excited to see how they respond =) They're super amazing. Gonna see them tomorrow. Hopefully we have some discussion =) 

p. requests: 
- just to work hard and not to worry about marks
- diligent and disciplined in everything I do 
- mom 

thanks team

-Chris 

where are you with discipline?

Hey

So I just finished reading a blog that's kind of like a devo. Actually got it off py =P It's pretty cool. Maybe I need to do that more. Take like the verses and dissect them one by one instead of just going through an entire chapter and taking the chapter's message. Well both are necessary. It talked about discipline. And it's a word that's really been in my life recently. Discipline. Discipline to do devos. Discipline to keep up with people. Discipline to not play flash games. Discipline to help out around the house. Discipline to not be lazy. I think that's a big one. I can find myself being really lazy sometimes. 

Thank God that I've been able to do my devos consistently and just sitting there in bed aganist the wall every night just gives me time to think and even though I sleep a little later because of it, I think I'd rather spend that time awake and spending it praying than asleep because it just calms you down. 

And now I must go. But thought I'd just write a little about that =P 

So goodnight and farewell =)

p.requests: 
- discipline =P
- mom

You paint the morning sky, with miracles in mind

Hey

So yesterday morning I woke up at like 6:10 to say goodbye to my mom as she left for the hospital and i hugged her for like the first time in a while. My family's not very touchy. But it felt like it was going to be alright. My mom didn't look too worried and that morning for some odd reason even though I'd only got 5 and a half hours of sleep, i felt pretty awake and up.

The whole day I think I spent more time praying within the walking time and everything. It's Week...B so it's a little more rushed from 2nd to 3rd but it's alright. And it went well. The operation. She's actually out now. She sounded tired yesterday on the phone but it was alright. She's over at my grandma's for a week to recuperate and to not increase her stress levels with like house work. That's pretty good I guess and a chance for her to just relax after.

I guess it's been a pretty all in all good 2 days. Today we had a drunk driving and impaired driving presentation by a guy who i couldn't fully understand for the majority of the time but I guess it reminded me of the message on Sunday and how Cheryl said to ask God to break your heart for those who didn't know him. And it's sad how so many people turn to drugs because they feel unworthy or they need something to supplement their pain or something to just do. And if only they knew God, they wouldn't have to go to those things. They could find support and love from a small group or just...anything. And so maybe that was a realization today. Because after Crazy Love i've been focused so much on like 3rd world countries and i've forgotten about the immense pain that

no way but onward, no day but today

Hey

So last night, I had some fun over at Ben's house and it was fun hanging out with my friends and we went to the park, did some ridiculous things as we ALWAYS do in public =P Though there weren't too many people out and it was only 5 too. The sun sets so quickly nowadays. Me and marco were talking about it and how you always feel like it's crazy late even when it's only like....5. Like right now I feel like it's 11 at night. It's only 7:30 =P But it's been a crazy weekend. Full of...things that are just exploding all over the place =P. My friends got me Taboo and Disney Sing It. I don't know what i'm going to do with Sing It =P They're a little crazy sometimes but I love them all =) I really didn't need presents though. I remember someone last night said something about being happy and I said I'd be happy if there was no presents and we just chilled together. And it's true. And i'm sure it is for a lot of people. Me and my mom were talking about it today, it's really hard to get presents for people after a while. Like we're getting matt a present now and I just hope we don't spend it ridiculously and we get him something REAL and USEFUL. Because lately I've really been feeling like God's given me the wealth i have to give to others. I'm trying to save up for a missions trip in...July? Eagle Bay =)

So last night when we were all home from our outings and whatnot, we all sat down and took a picture with the cake that we had bought. It was apparently the one with the most ACTUAL cake cause you know these days when you buy a cake you don't really buy cake, you buy icing and filling and all the cheaper mousse and it's like oversweetened and whatnot. Well it didn't have too much cake =P But it was alright. My mom said it's like the ONLY time we ever take family pictures. Well one of the rare moments =P Me and my sister have developed poses that don't require us to smile =P And so for the majority of the pictures we had weird poses. Like look at one another and point and make squished up faces =P It was fun. And then afterwards they sat us down and the 4 of us kind of talked officially about my mom's condition and the surgery. And it wasn't like it was sobering on my birthday to hear it but more like....I don't know...i valued sitting like that. The last time it was the 4 of us like that...the situation was less pleasant. And i realized that the situation we were in now had brought the family closer. My parents were getting along much better. I was starting to become more active. And my sister...well she's in Kingston but still.
And it's such a miracle that we even know about it because usually my mom's normal doctor wouldn't have allowed her to take a mammogram and she wouldn't have found out about it but she went to her doctor she hadn't seen in 6 years and it just happened that she let her take a mammogram. PTL =) indeed

My sister left tonight. I had planned to go shopping with her but my mom persuaded me not to go because she had a lab report to do. And I guess I wanted to talk to her about some stuff but we didn't the chance. I guess i'll see her in a couple weeks but it's always nice having her home. She's such an epic influence =P Well I should be off. Waking up early tomorrow.

p.requests:
- Trust in the Lord
- Mother
- Discipline for myself

-Chris

you sing all around, but i rarely hear a sound

haha hey =)

So today's a BEAUTIFUL DAY! in terms of the crazy amazing weather =) It's WARM! and it's like mid november. Which is kind of trippy. According to my mom usually when me and my sister were born, it had snowed on like the day of. And then up to a couple years ago, it stopped snowing so early. I wonder if that's a good thing. Probably not. But it kind of makes me happy that it's still warm on some days in November. =) Beautiful day. Agnes' home =P which i guess is always a nice thing to have. Makes the house louder. With random music =P and the car. And it's nice to just talk to her =) It's good =) And it was supposed to be a surprise =P but my parents are absolutely TERRIBLE at keeping secrets =) So um...they kind of failed =P but it was good effort. And so she's back. And it's good times =) She's amazing. Spiritually, emotionally, sisterly =)

Last night was another KNA night. And at first I was kind of freaking out because I couldn't make the AV set up and my clock was an hour late so i thought i was SUPER LATE when i woke up from my nap but i wasn't. And i couldn't make the 6:30 meet up for the discussion for the program because my sister came home and we just wanted to eat dinner together. And it was good. Because I went to KNA like...refreshed. And I was kind of in a rush but it was alright because it was like there wasn't any burdens because I'd just spent family time and we laughed SO MUCH. and I loved it =) And when I got to KNA it was crazy because NOBODY other than K-cab was there. I thought i was early. But i wasn't =P And i thought it was a k-cab meeting. And it was the discussion and it'd just ended =P And so i'm like WHAT! but it was good because me and Calvin got to talk about what we were doing in it. And we talked and we got to pray and we went over the program. And it was just amazing that God gave us that time to talk about it even though I"d been late. Nat couldn't lead that night. and B.wong came a little later but we coordinated after =)
Ended up doing both AV jobs but it was alright. I'm slow at slides =P But that's alright. It was some good meditating time. Haven't heard Amazed in a long time. I think I really like that song =) And funny thing is it's the first song that popped up when i clicked my blog to listen to some tunes =) The activity was funny =P Yay for not knowing when New Moon comes out eh? And just in general it was good. And then we got to discussion and this week it felt like a lot more people talked and we went in circles and it was just awesome to see people talking =) and R's so active. He's so eager! =) I love it =P Though he gives like the bombest answers and so nobody else really answers because he's covered most of it =P So sometimes i have to restrict him =)
The discussion felt more natural. The points were easy and it didn't take a lot of sheet looking so Praise the Lord =) I love my cell group. I think I"m going to challenge them with the giving thing. The other CGL's agreed to it. =)
And yesterday I got like....3 cards and 1 drawing. A beautiful one i might add. =) Thanks so much PY. I framed it this morning. I'm like "YES! I CAN FINALLY USE THE FRAME!" because I've had the frame for a year and nothing fit =P And now something does =) And I got caked. And it was just fun to wash it off. Because getting cake exfoliation is always the best =P And i'm just grateful that I have such amazing friends in fellowship that would make cards and just....so much insanity =) I love them so much. Thank you God for such amazing friends.
I have yet to give Freddy his tour of his office =P He needs one.

p.requests:
- that i take more time with God just sitting with Him in prayer
- Thanksgiving =)
- my mom.
- that i take hold of this amazing day. and let him control it. Because he's made me =) And made me glad.

-Chris

Loves like a hurricane, i am a tree

Hey

So today is a pretty chill day =) Which i guess is pretty good. Time to just think.

Learned how to wash rice =P As ridiculous and rudimentary as that sounds, i officially learned it today =) Which is good because now I'm ready for next week when hopefully i'll be doing half the chores of the house. I'm actually kind of excited for that because then i feel like i'm ACTUALLY contributing. I feel like often i don't contribute enough and sometimes my mom doesn't think i should be doing it because i'm "busy" when i'm not really but she thinks i am. So that'll be something. Kind of worried bout my mom =\ like how she'll be after it and the recuperating stages of it. I'm really grateful that people are praying for her =)

So yesterday was possibly the most stressful day of peer helping yet. Because the teacher left and he left the class with an in-class investigation that was open book, individual and was going to be marked like a test. Not the greatest idea =\ especially because the topic was more like....i don't know, they didn't know it that well. so they had ALOT of questions. so like 5 minutes in, 80% of the class had their hands up. and that was pretty intense. because that's a lot of kids that need help =\ and when you don't get to them fast enough...they start talking. And it was bad that they were talking because then they didn't get any work done =\ the first sub was alright except he explained the question differently than me and his explanation kind of confused the students so not too much help but he was alright. And then the second sub thought i was a regular student and told me to sit down =P the kids laughed at me for a good minute. and then we got back to work. kind of. =\ In the end most of them finished. But there were a couple that stayed a couple minute after school and i didn't have to go to my locker so i let them stay a couple extra minutes because I really wanted them to finish because they were smart kids just...really distracted =\ It was a learning experience i guess. I think i had to raise my voice once or twice yesterday because there was just so much talking and not enough working. Hopefully they didn't take that as me being angry. Because i don't think i was. Just a little frustrated. And needed to get it across the room.

Last night was the regular meet up and I was kind of really excited for it or at least just really anticipating seeing them because I love Wednesday nights. They kind of just make my week so much better because right in the middle of the week I can just spend time with some of my coolest friends and just talk about whatever =) This week...well it was more like manual laborizing =P So it's P.Fred's birthday tomorrow and I figured that while I was there I'd maybe clean up his room. Dustin, PY and Ben joined in and we literally EMPTIED his room. Simon provided us with a soundtrack while he Ophelloed it out =P So we took out EVERYTHING. Shoved it into the hallways and then we started. PY and Ben started on the papers which were SO MANY. but they tanked it and made folders and everything. Simon made tabs =) Dustin and me took out the boxes, shoved things INTO boxes. I figured out how many devo books freddy had that night. WAY TOO MANY! So all the art stuff is in one area now and it's prettied up =) It was funny because when we took everything out, we were all like IT'S SO CLEAN! and it was funny because it was only clean because there was nothing inside =P I also made an observation. Freddy's got the smallest office and the most stuff =P. So it was some intensive cramming. Tetris skills! Took us like 3 hours in total. Some crazy stuff. But it's a lot cleaner. Though he might need a tour of his room =P considering we kind of shoved everything into different places. Not that he'll be looking for the books i put in his shelf anytime soon =P We joked that his whole office was basically like a GIANT cardboard box with a computer in it =) Pastor Angelina was laughing at our efforts. Glad he likes it. =) And it was super fun =) Can't wait to see that video of him seeing it. Hope it's like....decent quality =P

Thank you God for being so awesome the past couple days. That I could just spend time with my friends. Spend time with you. And just spend time thinking about everything. Excited for tomorrow =) Fellowship's always amazing =)

P.Requests:
- Time with God
- Patience and Love in just everything I do
- Mom? =)

thanks
-Chris

you're the Peace to the restless

Hey

Yesterday was probably one of the most stressful days i've had in a while. Well stressful only because of school. Not because of fellowship or anything else but it was maddening trying to study, and finish a presentation and i ended up sleeping at like 12:20 ish. And i guess it wasn't something i was used to or rather something i hadn't experienced in a really long time. And i felt so...i don't quite know but as if i'd focused on the wrong things. That the presentation and the test weren't really all that big in the long run and I wish i would've spent more time doing devos. Because it's just so much more calming when i spend time reading the Word and reflecting.

Today I did the test, the presentation and everything and in the end the test wasn't as great as i expected it to be and i didn't do so well but i came out not freaking out. And it was calming. And PTL for that =) And i looked at some pictures that'd i'd developed and it was nice, remembering the amazing things that have happened these last couple of months like VBC, coffeehouse, softball, and the cruise. And it was just nice to remember that you know? like i feel like i've been getting so caught up in the past couple of weeks that i've forgotten the past couple months. PTL =)

I'm also H1N1 resistant now. Or hopefully. Now that i got that needle inserted into my body. My mom wanted me to get it. And I'm trying to be more willing so i did it. and it's alright i think. it's just going to hurt for the next couple of days. But now i guess i'm less susceptible of getting it...i think. If vaccines work. I never get them. Usually. =)
So just a short post. Going to spend some good devo time tonight =)
some good stuff.
thanks

p.requests:
- trust in the Lord
- be more obedient in terms of parents and God

One Last Day

Hey

So I just finished biking and taking that time just one more time around the neighborhood on a bike and the fresh air and everything before the autumn season ended. It was rather quick really. It's already been around 3 months since school started. Or maybe 2. But still, it's been 2 months. 60 days. 1440 hours. 86400 minutes. That's a lot of minutes. A really big amount. And yet it seems to have flown by so fast.
I guess maybe this is a reminiscing post =) I'm reading a long post from my friend as well. Which reminds me that I need to reply the email to another friend which is long overdue. =)

I feel like these past 2 months have passed by really fast. But along with new lessons. There's always new lessons =) Growth. Growth in God i think primarily. Because it's the moments that I spend with God and looking for God and seeing Him that really....make my day.
Because school seems to have passed by really fast, as if i'm just drifting through it and the only thing that makes me feel remotely helpful or that i'm doing something that's eternally based is peer helping. And for that course i'm actually so truly thankful. Because as much as my friends think it's a burden and that's it's super boring and not going to help me with all my university applications, it builds me up. It's humbling because I'm grade 11 and they're grade 9 and I can't think i'm superior because 1. i'm not 2. just not how it works son. And i love walking in there everyday and just having something that's not purely academic and if a student needs help I'll just...go over there =) It's so...easy =) But not in like a "oh i'll pass this course with flying colors" kind of easy but more like it's a lot more natural than learning calculus =P
And they teach me things too. Well not really =P They tried teaching me how to do a rap move. I totally can't do it. And proud that I can't =) I also don't know who Drake is. I'm old school for that. And maybe I am =) But I think God's been building up my patience as well because sometimes it can be difficult teaching them and when they don't put in the effort but you know they can TOTALLY do it and you want to see them pass and do well soooo darn badly. It's good though =) Made some nice cool grade 9 friends. Doesn't make me age ignorant =) And i'm excited for the lesson i'm going to teach =) So that's school. Oh and bringing my friends to fellowship was a really big thing but i really hope i can keep that up. Not just bringing them to big events. But also to just...anything =) with some prayer.

Next would probably be my cell group. It seems like it hasn't been very long since we all met each other. But if you think about it, it's already been 1/6 of the KNA year. And i'm glad that i have the amazing co cell group leaders that i have =) And my cell group's really amazing. Quiet at times and most of the girls are more reserved but I can see them growing and I know i have to trust in God that they'll grow and that He'll use me, nat, brian and calvin to lead in whatever way He has called us to lead.

And i've grown in God. I think i've been doing devotions for....a while =) And i'm glad i'm taking it from the Bible because it's so much more real and it kind of amazes me how it was written so long ago and it's still relevant today. Like i'm listening to a sermon right now and the preacher is talking about how in the Bible is the best economic advice in the WORLD ever and it was written 2000 years ago. Said by Jesus. And it's crazy because economy back then was probably different. There wasn't a stock market, there wasn't a lot of variables and yet the advice can be carried on through the 2000 years and will carry on 3000 years from now if the Earth is still here and it's just awesome =) and it helps with my discipline. Because doing devos at 11:30 is doing devos and i'll be pushing myself to sleep earlier because i have to do devos and it's....great =)

And so today I went on a little biking adventure and it was amazing. The weather was gorgeous and just travelling around my neighborhood with my camera for the first time in a while was great. I went to a park just past Major Mac to visit Ryan and try and find out where he lived but I ended up at his park and it was like one of the coolest parks ever =) like it's made so cooly. It's like the park close to BA. And I just sat there. And the sun was setting at like 5 but it didn't matter because it was still a little warm and there were just 2 families in the area =) It was a pair of grandparents and this little child no more than 4 years old. and it was just so amazing. The kid was beautiful =) And they were playing with him and carrying him and his grandpa was just like SOOO energetic. And when people ask me about what i want to be when i grow up, i don't really know. I just know that God's put this giant passion for being a father =) And that's what I say. I'm not really worried about university. Because to be honest, it's not that big of a deal. I'm going to have God. That's about all i need right? =)

Another thing. After Crazy Love, which i ended up lending to Taylor, I'm really trying to live it out. And it's been getting better. Today in baptismal class we talked about tithing. And I have a "job" now. Apparently =P I didn't think i'd get paid for tutoring my little cousin. But I'm glad i do. I guess i'm trying to put off shopping until at least the new year. And it's hard in some senses. I have this giant puffy Gap coat that's white, orange and grey and it's warm and it fits but i can feel myself making up excuses to buy a new coat. But i'm not going to. Because a $200 coat i don't need can ship $12000 worth of clothes to children who don't have warm clothes. The World Vision Catalogue seems to have found it's way into my spending habits =P It's good. And I hope I can keep this up. Because i really don't feel a need to buy things. And there's just....something about it eh? =) Praying that it'll continue and it's some good character discipline building. =)

So that's the end of that. Pretty long one. Haven't done one so long in a while =) took me a while to write too =P but it's good.

p. requests:
- discipline to not play games and actually legitly do work
- trust in God
- family time (spent some time in the kitchen today. it was good =)

-Chris

Remember the Sacrifice

Hey

So lately I guess I've been feeling like i've been wasting my time or a lot of my of time. The time that God gave me to work in this world and to follow Him and to simply love Him. And i waste it on the dumbest things. Like honestly I spent an hour this morning on my dad's itouch playing some tower defense game. I need to discipline myself. I'm glad that i'm disciplining myself to do devos everyday no matter what time it is. But it needs to spread into my entire life. As they were saying tonight.

Yesterday was the bible study and it went with some glitches but for the most part, i think it was alright and PTL that people were able to resonate with it from what I heard from the cell group leaders. For my own cell group, I guess i was a little uneasy with nat not being there but it was really great that brian and calvin were there but we had to rush it in the end. I guess it felt kind of forced with my cell group but maybe it wasn't. Maybe they got something out of it. And i guess that's a big part of cell group leading. Trusting that the Lord has a plan for how the cell group was going to grow.

Today I had my TC AV interview. It was alright. AFC headquarters are cozy =) Saw PY there. And it was pretty relaxed overall. I'll know in a couple weeks =P

And then I guess the main thing is tonight. K-cab got together and it was just so much fun cooking and bonding and watching Remember the Titans. And the little time that we had to talk, it was great because we all shared and there were some things that were so...real and it was just amazing how we were so open to one another. It was like candle light sharing. But one round. But that was enough =) Loved it. Hope we get to spend more time with each other in just prayer and bonding.

And i just finished my testimony. CRAZY RUSH!
gotta send it to joe
and sleep
=)

p. requests:
- parents , they ain't christian and my mom...well
- discipline
- trust in God
- just spending more time with Him in general

peace

would you break this hardened heart?

hey

so i'll keep it short today considering it's already 10 and i really should be doing my devos, sleeping and what not.
last night i felt kind of bad because i stayed up till 1 doing my project and my mom was helping me even though i told her to go to bed because i know she's more susceptible to like flu and stuff than i am. and in the end the main reason why it was so rushed was because i couldn't read dates properly and also because i need to be more self disciplined =\
for the past week i've been sitting at a computer for most of the day and sometimes i'm doing stuff. and sometimes i'm just playing games =\ and this is something God really needs to change in me. Because when i fill my life with garbage like flash games, i have no time left to do His work. Shortcomings. I just came up with that word. And it seems to apply =\

i wanted to reply to an email today. to catch up with a friend. to do my testimony. to write a sponsorship letter. to start on a lesson plan.
I got one of those things done today. Somehow 3 hours just seemed to fly by and pass. Sometimes my conversations with people are fruitful. and yet, sometimes there's a lot of empty space between them and no real substance. But i guess today i also spent like a LITTLE more time in the kitchen. Which i think i'll start doing. Because i learn to cook and spend some time with my parents.
Also, the bible study's still...a little worrying. And i'm not thinking about it as much as I should. And i need to give it up to God.
And to give myself more devo time, i will go now.

p.requests:
- that I will give God the things that i'm still holding onto
- to be more self disciplined
- to not be worried about things that are just too small to worry about
- to be focused

thanks =)
-Chris

It's a rising up all around...

Hey

I just got back from bible pre-study and well...I'm not quite sure but I think it went really well. But not because of the outline that me and nat and calvin made, but because k-cab is absolutely amazing. I guess I had felt kind of worried and nervous before the prestudy. I think a lot of it came from just feeling like I hadn't prepared very much and I actually hadn't looked at it since last sunday when we all planned it together =\ And nat wasn't going to be there. But i'd known that for at least a week.
I think a lot of myself today was overworried. Over worried about the food. And in a sense, overworried about the prestudy. It was good to hear their comments. And it was short. And I do need to work on planning. And logistics. And need to come up with an activity. Me and calvin. And nat if she's not too busy tonight. But that's all stuff that can be done relatively quickly. I'm just so glad that K-cab's so open.
We split off into 2 groups during the pre study and shared about our own relation to the bible study and it was just really good sharing in a circle. It felt....like fellowship. Something I guess we haven't had in a while since tuesdays ended. And I'm just so grateful that people were supportive and I pray that God will work in the program. That in the individual cell groups they'll be able to take away the point of it.

Last night was fall fest. It was alright i guess. We pulled together a cute little booth =P. It felt like a lot less kids. A lot less candy/toys and the booths were....well there was some variety but stuff like the patrick kind of scared me a little =P It was good seeing some fellowship people there even though it was mostly cell group leaders and regular church attendees. Kind of reminded me of VBC. Seeing all the kiddies. They were so amazing =) And now that I'm doing children worship, it's gonna be awesome =)

Right now, I'm talking with a person from my cell group and....it's really interesting =) and now i'm writing my baptismal testimony =P before i forget. or run out of time
And i hope i get to spend like real time with God tonight. in devotion. in prayer. in silence. whatever it is.